Sat in a folding chair
Paper mask over my mouth and nose
cold and bored
Observing as he unseals the chimney breast
uses an old axe head and a bolster
to pull the plaster board away
Soot and coal dust fly
he takes possession of his new place
his hearth
his home
He’s happy
It is my task to sit and watch
Why I have flown over the ocean
a necessary pressence
to be the sounding board for his ideas
to make suggestions he will scorn but
will be the catalyst
for his decisions
he will assume my approval
whether I have given it or not
is not something that will matter or register in him
To be
THERE
silent mother in the line of sight
while the toddler plays in a world of its own
carry his burdens
keep him safe
tidy when he is done
up and UP
green feilds falling away
ascending through mist, clouds and then blue sky
and with each foot another layer
thin grimy film of bitter embedded memory
peal it off and let it
flutter behind me
in the jet stream
to sink into the ocean
swallowed by white crested waves
and further up
and further away
leave the chair
the chimney breast and hearth
he has his place
and now naked of his needs
I will find mine
Oct. 21st, 2009